Who among us has not suffered loss? It’s a sad reminder that we live on this side of Jesus’ return when we experience loss and must begin the process of grieving. Even God experienced grief. Think about how Jesus, in John chapter 11, knows that his friend Lazarus will die; and even knowing that (since in John, Jesus knows everything), when he meets Mary and Martha on the way to Bethany, “Jesus began to weep.” Who are you grieving for right now?

Grief is not an easy journey for anyone. Rather we traverse it each in our own ways, and for our own periods of time. Sometimes joining Jesus in weeping. Sometimes we scream in anger. Sometimes we just sit silently pondering all that has and all that will happen now. All of these are appropriate reactions to loss. What has your reaction been to loss?

We too, as a congregation, have undergone great loss over the past few years. Not only have we lost blessed friends and family from our numbers (by death or departure); we also have lost a vision of who we are as a community of faith: What makes St. James unique among other communities of faith? What makes St. James a place for the community around us to find experiences of Christ? And what makes St. James do what we do right now while discovering more of who God made us to be anew?

Deep down, I’ve wondered, “What is grief?” especially since it seems to be so complex. It’s a process for some involving working through feelings and reactions to loss. In 1969, Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross wrote a seminal book called, On Death and Dying. In that work, she outlines the now known Five Stages of Grief: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance. These various ‘stages’ have often been seen as a linear progression; however, Kubler-Ross even stated often that they perhaps better thought of as poles around a circle which people bounce between. In 2019, a protege of Kubler-Ross named David Kessler, with blessings from the estate and foundation of his mentor, published a book describing a Sixth stage of grief: Meaning. Though, it is meant in the spirit of asking, “how can I find meaning in my life because of this loss that has happened?”

That is our call! This past Good Lent, my oldest daughter turned to my wife and I to ask to the effect of, “It’s so sad that Jesus died. Why did he?” And since then we’ve been remembering the core of that why? Love! “For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him may not perish but may have eternal life. Because God did not send the Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order the world might be saved through him” (John 3:16-17). The unbounded and unmerited love of God is ours to share! And share we do! That’s why loss, and grief are so painful. To quote a popular super-hero show that was an exploration of grief, (WandaVision, 2021) “What is grief, if not love persevering?"

 Why are we so desperate to cry, so ready to deny, so angry, so willing to bargain, so easily depressed, so long in accepting, and find it so difficult to move on with a loss: Love! We loved others just as much as we love those who are around us right now! I announce to you all an opportunity forth coming to explore that persevering love. It has no official name yet. I have no day, time or place. Yet, what we will have is each other. We will have the sacred fellowship of joining each other as we explore the grief and grow into the future, or to capture the spirit of Kessler’s work, “How can we live now with this loss?” As a congregation, let us unite and grow in our love and life together. Amen.